An Antique Land
Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Two kids on the shuttle today, chatting in Spanish:

Kid 1: "Hey, look. Look at him." [points at me]

Kid 2: "What?" [giggles, the cheeky bastard]

Kid 1: "His nose is huge! It's probably longer than his dick!"

Me, in Spanish: "Okay, seriously, could you wait until I get off the bus?"

[Pause]

Kid 1: "No."

==========

The Killer's voice is very hard to get a hold of... and it becomes a lot harder when I have to switch back and forth between Alice and The Killer. So anyways, The Killer's busy murdering a girl and washing out bloodstains; Alice, meanwhile, is enjoying the public transportation system.

11 o’clock

Cockney accents fill the back of the bus and spill into front, but Alice doesn’t mind. She stares out the window at the rained-smeared lights and imagines herself in London. She’s never been to London, but she can fake a decent Londoner accent, and she watches lots of soc— football matches, so she allows herself the brief fantasy of a foreign land.

“Next stop: Democracy Boulevard,” chimes the bus, friendly and entirely wrong. Democracy Boulevard remains three stops behind, and Alice is fairly sure the bus cannot time travel.

Alice checks her watch, a blue and red explosion that wraps around her wrist. The watch is cereal box branded and inexplicably accurate, and it reassures Alice that no, the bus is not time traveling; she still has five more stops till the library.

She feels slightly disappointed, but a shadow in the form of Big Ben cuts across the window and makes her smile.

=========

I had something else to say, but it's hard to concentrate when you can hear a housemate turn on her Rabbit.

Well, maybe it's for the best... I have lives to save!

objectionably yours,
jdl

P.S. No asterisks?!

Labels: alice once wrestled thor, bored, funny, writing, wrong alice

10:38 PM
2 comments :

• At May 29, 2008 7:22 PM,
   Just a girl said…
  
  Seriously?! The Spanish thing? OMG that's hilarious.
  
  Love the prose. Looking forward to more. ;-)
  
  x
  JAG
   
• At May 29, 2008 7:27 PM,
   Just a girl said…
  
  PS: Oh, and I will not be mocking, but I would expect nothing less of you. =)
   

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